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Author Topic: As life goes by and the nest empties  (Read 21141 times)

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Offline cuckoobird

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #50 on: September 20, 2015, 10:41:48 am »
RP my oldest is a girl and she drives me nuts too. Both boys are on the right track though

Offline WPWells

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #51 on: September 20, 2015, 10:44:31 am »
I've gotten closer to my parents since I moved away for college. I talk to each of them at least five times per week

Offline sevenof400

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #52 on: September 20, 2015, 12:17:40 pm »
While I don't have the Saturday morning games/practices etc, I still enjoy going to the high school games and watching. Although that is about to run out of kids who were younger siblings of those who played with mine.


I think that connection (or the absence of it) is important in determine the strength of our bond to a school.  It is hard to be overly concerned about an outcome of a sporting event without some connection to it. 

The lack of (or our weakness of) social bonds today as compared to a generation (or two) ago is telling. 

Offline Lions84

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #53 on: September 21, 2015, 10:33:45 am »
Once the kid heads SW to College we will be hitting those College games instead of HS on Friday Nights.

Offline Lions84

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #54 on: September 30, 2015, 11:14:56 am »
Oct is almost here and this month I have our last Band Night and our SR Night next to last game of the year cause the final is on the road this year;

Offline Lions84

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #55 on: October 20, 2015, 09:45:25 am »
Well the Fall part of my Daughters UIL Band is done.  Band night was last Friday and Senior Night is next week .

Offline sevenof400

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #56 on: October 20, 2015, 12:29:23 pm »
I was thinking about this thread earlier today as a result of one of those weird moments life sometimes throws at you.  I walked into one of those combo gas service stations / food stores that are just about everywhere now.  Not really paying attention to anything in particular, my attention turned toward the television playing somewhat loudly in the corner.  The Channel 11 morning news was on but as I watched for a few seconds, I couldn't place the broadcast.  For some reason, Channel 11 just didn't register in my mind - and then it hit me. 

I couldn't recall the last time I watched Channel 11 for anything

Now I grew up in an era where we had an antennae to receive over the air TV broadcasts.  Later on when I moved to Arkansas, I recall that 4, 7 and 11 were it for choices (I never watched Channel 2 back then).  The starting of Channel 16 was big since we now had a fourth choice. 

And now look where we are.  I can't watch 4/7/11/16 anymore because most of the programming is awful and commercial infested.  And then there is the blight called satellite TV.  The point here though is a lack (more a loss) of a common source of information (local TV) that used to tie us together in someways.

No more.

Not TV, newspaper, radio - even sports can do that anymore. 

I'm not sure we realize what we may have lost. 

Offline Lions84

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #57 on: October 21, 2015, 09:20:17 am »
We have more channels than Carters has Liver pills.  Yes I remember going out and using a pipe wrench to turn the Antenna to get a better picture. Growing up in Monroe County we could get the Memphis and Greenville TV stations if the weather was right.

Offline Lions84

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #58 on: October 22, 2015, 01:54:28 pm »
The Kid is taking care of business and the March toward the Holidays goes on.

Offline Lions84

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #59 on: November 02, 2015, 09:46:51 am »
Friday Night My Daughter was escorted on the Field at GHS for the Last time as a Varsity Cheerleader and Captain of this years Squad. It was a emotional time for all 3 of us and My BIL drove up from Austin to be with us and take pictures. We finish the regular season on the Road this week.

Offline PrivateLesson

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #60 on: November 02, 2015, 02:10:36 pm »
I am sure it was an emotional time....I can only imagine how I will respond when the time comes.  They grow up so very fast.  Why we must love them with all our hearts each and every day and never take one second of their smile and joy for granted.  Best of Luck and God Bless you and your family. 

Offline Lions84

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #61 on: November 03, 2015, 02:52:53 pm »
I am sure it was an emotional time....I can only imagine how I will respond when the time comes.  They grow up so very fast.  Why we must love them with all our hearts each and every day and never take one second of their smile and joy for granted.  Best of Luck and God Bless you and your family. 

Thanks is just seems like yesterday she was in mini Cheer Camp and tonight she cheer for the Volleyball team who in the playoffs.

Online AirWarren

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #62 on: November 03, 2015, 07:27:51 pm »
Friday Night My Daughter was escorted on the Field at GHS for the Last time as a Varsity Cheerleader and Captain of this years Squad. It was a emotional time for all 3 of us and My BIL drove up from Austin to be with us and take pictures. We finish the regular season on the Road this week.

My daughter had her first year of cheer this fall. It was very fun.

Offline sevenof400

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #63 on: November 03, 2015, 08:14:19 pm »
So many thoughts, feelings and emotions come to the surface when we are faced with events that delineate time so clearly.  Enjoy these days. 

I can't help but wonder that at the same time many of us struggle to find meaning in our lives that we can miss such important moments that we may not see ever.again.  Do everything you can to remember these moments.

Offline WC-soccer dad

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #64 on: November 04, 2015, 08:31:44 am »
So many thoughts, feelings and emotions come to the surface when we are faced with events that delineate time so clearly.  Enjoy these days. 

I can't help but wonder that at the same time many of us struggle to find meaning in our lives that we can miss such important moments that we may not see ever.again.  Do everything you can to remember these moments.

But oh my old friend/coaching buddy just wait until we resurface as coaches/referees  for our grandkids!!!

Offline Lions84

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #65 on: November 05, 2015, 01:40:13 pm »
Friday Night My Daughter was escorted on the Field at GHS for the Last time as a Varsity Cheerleader and Captain of this years Squad. It was a emotional time for all 3 of us and My BIL drove up from Austin to be with us and take pictures. We finish the regular season on the Road this week.

My daughter had her first year of cheer this fall. It was very fun.

Enjoy it , Take Plenty of Pictures it goes by too fast.
« Last Edit: November 18, 2015, 11:14:27 am by Lions84 »

Offline Lions84

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #66 on: November 06, 2015, 09:49:56 am »
To night my Daughter Cheers in her last regular season Game.
« Last Edit: November 10, 2015, 12:58:11 pm by Lions84 »

Offline Legend

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #67 on: November 08, 2015, 07:05:25 am »
My son just turned 6. He has a learning disability and I enjoy every moment with him. Me and his mother is split so I get every other weekend and a few days during the week when we can get along. Its been a struggle but he is learning so much every day

Offline Lions84

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #68 on: November 10, 2015, 12:58:50 pm »
To night my Daughter Cheers in her last regular season Game.


We won and are off to the Playoffs for the 3rd time in her 4 years of HS Cheer leading.

Offline Lions84

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #69 on: November 16, 2015, 02:44:14 pm »
Baby Girl cheered in her last Varsity Football Game forever Sat Night.  Our boys fought hard but got knocked out.

This month we buy her SR Ad and next month we order her last HS Annual.

Offline sevenof400

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #70 on: November 16, 2015, 06:37:42 pm »
We are one year behind you Lions84.  And then we will have an empty nest.  I've talked to a few folks at this same stage of life and to say the least, it will take some adjustment.  In a million years, I never would have thought this may be the toughest portion of adult life but it sure seems to be shaping up as such. 


Offline Legend

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #71 on: November 17, 2015, 05:42:39 am »
Ive got many more years before that. My son started Kindergarten but might be delayed a year with his speech impetitment. So much of todays world is social skills and he is very behind in that department. I am so worried about him growing up with that speech problem this day and age.

Offline Lions84

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #72 on: November 17, 2015, 11:32:46 am »
We are one year behind you Lions84.  And then we will have an empty nest.  I've talked to a few folks at this same stage of life and to say the least, it will take some adjustment.  In a million years, I never would have thought this may be the toughest portion of adult life but it sure seems to be shaping up as such. 



I understand We are blessed that in our Adult SS class at Church we have couples who have kids out of college and one still in HS , Kid or kids out of the house in College or Married, and 2 with Sr's like us.  Being able to talk with the empty nesters has been a blessing.

Online AirWarren

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #73 on: November 17, 2015, 07:00:01 pm »
Ive got many more years before that. My son started Kindergarten but might be delayed a year with his speech impetitment. So much of todays world is social skills and he is very behind in that department. I am so worried about him growing up with that speech problem this day and age.

Occupationa/Speech therapy in pediatrics is a wonderful thing. Pray hard and continue to work with him. Things will be ok.

Offline Lions84

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #74 on: November 18, 2015, 11:16:38 am »
Ive got many more years before that. My son started Kindergarten but might be delayed a year with his speech impetitment. So much of todays world is social skills and he is very behind in that department. I am so worried about him growing up with that speech problem this day and age.



Occupationa/Speech therapy in pediatrics is a wonderful thing. Pray hard and continue to work with him. Things will be ok.

Yep your kid got way more help available to him now than they did even 10 years ago.   The School and Shriners both should have programs for him to go to.

Offline Legend

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #75 on: November 19, 2015, 12:14:44 pm »
He went to that Shmieding Center in Lowell and its pretty cool but they classifed him as having a intellectual disabitlity which is nice way of saying hes mentally retarded and hes a brilliant kid just his motor and social skills are lacking. I was very upset with the lady who diagnosed him. He has 3 types of therapy 3 times a week and they do a great job with him at the FCLC. He loves going there and what I love the most is my son goes to school with kids with alot worse disabilites than him and when he sees one in public he will give them a hug and call him friends opposed to staring. He thinks its normal!

Offline Lions84

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #76 on: November 19, 2015, 01:36:36 pm »
He went to that Shmieding Center in Lowell and its pretty cool but they classifed him as having a intellectual disabitlity which is nice way of saying hes mentally retarded and hes a brilliant kid just his motor and social skills are lacking. I was very upset with the lady who diagnosed him. He has 3 types of therapy 3 times a week and they do a great job with him at the FCLC. He loves going there and what I love the most is my son goes to school with kids with alot worse disabilites than him and when he sees one in public he will give them a hug and call him friends opposed to staring. He thinks its normal!

You stick to your guns Brother The School tested our daughter in 5th grade and they said she had a 70 IQ we told them they were full of crap and kept working with her and getting her tutoring through Sylvan Learning Center for nearly 2 years.  They told us to have her tested for Dyslexia we did and got her into the MTA program and today she a Sr , ranked 19th out of 140  and a 3.5 gpa.

Offline Valleysports

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #77 on: November 19, 2015, 03:36:43 pm »
+100  :)

Offline Legend

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #78 on: November 20, 2015, 02:02:59 pm »
My kid can run You Tube XBOX PS3 and any kind of smart phone but they want to label him as intelectually disabled. He would get frusterated on something then give up on the rest and i pointed that out and the lady thought I was dumb

Offline Lions84

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #79 on: November 20, 2015, 02:49:59 pm »
Hang in there and ask around for support groups   My daughter is very verbal learner If she hears it she learns it.  I cant tell you the hours I have read to her the past 17 years.

Offline Legend

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #80 on: November 25, 2015, 07:28:24 am »
My son is the other way around. He is a visual learner. Thank you everyone for your support. Only those who have raised children with disabilities understand the day to day struggle and I know there are families whose struggles are far worse than mine but when its your own the struggle doesnt matter its still there.

Offline Lions84

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #81 on: December 02, 2015, 10:32:15 am »
My son is the other way around. He is a visual learner. Thank you everyone for your support. Only those who have raised children with disabilities understand the day to day struggle and I know there are families whose struggles are far worse than mine but when its your own the struggle doesnt matter its still there.

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Tonite my Daughter attends her last Fall Sports Banquet where she will be recognized at the Only SR Varsity Cheerleader.  The milestones of her SR year are passing by like a Cotton Belt Express Train.

Offline Legend

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #82 on: December 03, 2015, 05:52:55 am »
I only get to see him every other weekend and its very hard to cram 2 weeks into 2 days. My finace oldest son came up to me one day and I told him I was very proud of how he is with my son. The ten yr old told me that he knows hes different from his little brother (same age normal and gives him heck). I didnt even know how to respond to that.

Offline Valleysports

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #83 on: December 03, 2015, 05:03:09 pm »
Tonite my Daughter attends her last Fall Sports Banquet where she will be recognized at the Only SR Varsity Cheerleader.  The milestones of her SR year are passing by like a Cotton Belt Express Train.

Did I tell you that after they leave the nest, it's every bit as sad as you're imagining it might be?

Offline fastdrop

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #84 on: December 03, 2015, 06:34:09 pm »
Tonite my Daughter attends her last Fall Sports Banquet where she will be recognized at the Only SR Varsity Cheerleader.  The milestones of her SR year are passing by like a Cotton Belt Express Train.

Did I tell you that after they leave the nest, it's every bit as sad as you're imagining it might be?
ikr

Offline sevenof400

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #85 on: December 03, 2015, 09:09:59 pm »
Tonite my Daughter attends her last Fall Sports Banquet where she will be recognized at the Only SR Varsity Cheerleader.  The milestones of her SR year are passing by like a Cotton Belt Express Train.

Did I tell you that after they leave the nest, it's every bit as sad as you're imagining it might be?

A few years ago, I would have had no idea how much truth there is in that statement.  Now the truth haunts me every day. 

Offline PrivateLesson

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #86 on: December 04, 2015, 09:43:20 am »
In my prayers.   I can't even imagine.

Offline Lions84

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #87 on: December 04, 2015, 11:14:25 am »
Tonite my Daughter attends her last Fall Sports Banquet where she will be recognized at the Only SR Varsity Cheerleader.  The milestones of her SR year are passing by like a Cotton Belt Express Train.

Did I tell you that after they leave the nest, it's every bit as sad as you're imagining it might be?

Yes and so has several fathers in my SS class who have daughters 2-5 years older than my daughter. 

Offline Lions84

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #88 on: December 16, 2015, 09:09:21 am »
Well the kid got another acceptance letter to Ok Baptist University in Shawnee OK.  So she been accepted into 2 colleges and it not even Christmas yet.  On another note this will be her last Christmas at home as a HS student.  She will be 18 and in College this time next year.

Offline Legend

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #89 on: December 16, 2015, 10:00:34 am »
What is she wanting to major in?

Offline sevenof400

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #90 on: December 16, 2015, 12:15:26 pm »
There is a part of me that knows everything changes (and to expect change).  Yet just as has been said there is no way to adequately prepare for having kids, there is also no way to prepare for them leaving home.  I think back on the struggles we went though to put our kids in the best home we could - those spaces we worked so hard to provide and maintain transitioning to haunting reminders of those now absent. 

I guess I start to understand a bit better why some people move when their next is empty. 

Another aspect I see (and sense) are the changes in relationships occurring - not just with the child who is about to leave and his/her parent but the other familial relationships as well.  It is a process over which we have little (if any) control. 

Sorry for such a depressing thought.....

Offline Valleysports

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #91 on: December 17, 2015, 05:34:49 am »
True - you'll gradually lose contact with other parents (friends) your kids went to school and played sports with.  However they'll be replaced with other friends who'll come into your life, with your new interest.  I recommend visiting the Senior Citizens Home now, so you'll already know everyone when you check in .

Offline Lions84

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #92 on: December 18, 2015, 11:01:23 am »
What is she wanting to major in?

Piano composition She will teach Piano and play at a Church after College.

Offline Lions84

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #93 on: December 18, 2015, 11:02:46 am »
Today her last day of the Fall Semester of her SR Year of HS.  Dear Lord where did the time go. 

Online HorseFeathers

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #94 on: December 20, 2015, 09:22:36 pm »
My oldest is 6...but you guys are leaving me depressed about 12 years from now

Offline Rayburn

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #95 on: December 21, 2015, 03:17:39 pm »
I have not experienced this struggle. Our youngest of three girls left the home in August of last year. There's been the usual thoughts of missing certain things about having the girls around, but there's also been a burgeoning of the marital relationship. My wife and I are going to have our very first Christmas date of our entire married life this year. We had a little one when we got married and have never had a one-on-one, husband-wife gift exchange for Christmas. It's just one example of many of the type I could give.

I have found the free time wonderful. I'm sure it helps that we've been ever-so fortunate that all three of our girls have turned out pretty well-adjusted and so far have lived fairly crisis free lives on their own. I recognized early on that relationship changes  talked about so much were going to require changes from me. I knew when each one left my role would change, to use a sports metaphor, from coach to cheerleader. I still advise and guide, but only when asked, even when I know they're messing up.

They don't belong to me any longer. Indeed they never did, they were just put in my care for a couple decades. They always belonged to God and they still do, so I trust Him to continue handling things as He sees best, albeit with much prayer from me on their behalf.

But for us it's not been a huge struggle. We struggle way more trying to get my sister-in-law raised and she's older than both of us.  :-\

Offline sevenof400

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #96 on: December 21, 2015, 05:04:17 pm »
My oldest is 6...but you guys are leaving me depressed about 12 years from now

I wish I could tell you how to prepare for it HF, but I don't know that you can.

For now, enjoy the time with your kids as much as you can.

Offline ppop

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #97 on: December 25, 2015, 10:16:14 pm »
Haven't been here in a LONG time. Interesting thread. Mrs. ppop & I just spent our 4th Christmas morning with a totally empty nest. Both kids are married and our daughter has given us three beautiful grands with #4 due next month. They spend Christmas Day with their immediate family, just like we taught them.
The first couple of months were really tough. Depressing even. Luckily, my wife & I still love to be with each other! This is the best time of our life. (Of course, we've said that about every time of our lives.)
Turns out we love each other even more than we did when we were in college. Times change. Families change. Relationships last.
We've been through a lot, including a bilateral mastectomy resulting from invasive ductile carcinoma. (She's doing great after surgery & chemo.) We're stronger now than ever.
Hang in there guys. It gets SO much better!

Offline Lions84

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #98 on: January 05, 2016, 01:27:32 pm »
Well my Daughter her last first day of the Spring Semester today.  In May she Graduates.  We spent part of the Holiday with her writing papers for Scholarships and me and momma relearning the ever changing student loan system.  Glad we got a SS member who had one just get out of TCU and has told us he will walk us through and ensure we don't make the 2 mistakes he did.

Online AirWarren

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Re: As life goes by and the nest empties
« Reply #99 on: January 05, 2016, 02:51:04 pm »
Haven't been here in a LONG time. Interesting thread. Mrs. ppop & I just spent our 4th Christmas morning with a totally empty nest. Both kids are married and our daughter has given us three beautiful grands with #4 due next month. They spend Christmas Day with their immediate family, just like we taught them.
The first couple of months were really tough. Depressing even. Luckily, my wife & I still love to be with each other! This is the best time of our life. (Of course, we've said that about every time of our lives.)
Turns out we love each other even more than we did when we were in college. Times change. Families change. Relationships last.
We've been through a lot, including a bilateral mastectomy resulting from invasive ductile carcinoma. (She's doing great after surgery & chemo.) We're stronger now than ever.
Hang in there guys. It gets SO much better!

Love hearing these stories.

 

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